Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
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