Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Randomize
