I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
