your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
