he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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