ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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