I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
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