I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
