Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
