Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
