Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Do you still have your period?
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
i now understand why vodka
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
