Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
