Where is the hickey?
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
