i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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