i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
