Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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