how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize