My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize