Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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