Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Hippo gnu deer
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize