she was so not down for the gang bang
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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