I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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