i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize