lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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