Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
nutella sex= disaster
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
