i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
