he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Randomize