I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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