ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
