officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
