i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize