I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
