If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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