Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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