you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I think my fart just growled at me.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
