I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i can't believe i had my finger in that
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
