yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
