so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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