Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
