I feel great
I just peed on a car
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Randomize
