ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I just want nice things and good sex
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
