Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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