She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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