; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
