hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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