Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
