Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize