We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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