Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
