you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize