Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
